When you think of your inner critic, you might picture that nagging, negative voice that seems determined to tear you down. And you’re right—it is a judgmental, self-doubting voice that loves to disguise itself as “truth” while quietly sabotaging your progress. But what exactly is this voice, and how can you keep it from holding you back?

What IS the Inner Critic?

Let’s start with what the inner critic isn’t. It’s not you. I know that might feel hard to believe—after all, it sounds like your own voice, doesn’t it? But your inner critic isn’t a reflection of your worth, willpower, or strength.

Your inner critic is deeply rooted in both your brain’s biology and your early experiences.

From a biological perspective, the inner critic stems from your brain’s survival instincts. When you contemplate stepping outside your comfort zone, your brain’s fear response activates, whispering (or shouting), “Don’t do it!” It’s a primitive mechanism designed to keep you safe from danger. But here’s the catch: in modern life, the “danger” isn’t life-threatening—it’s the fear of failure, rejection, or discomfort. While these feelings are uncomfortable, they won’t harm you. You’ve faced them before and come out stronger.

Your early experiences also shape how the inner critic develops. If you grew up with criticism or high expectations, you may have internalized those voices, creating an inner dialogue that constantly questions your abilities or demands perfection.

3 Sneaky Ways the Inner Critic Shows Up

1.    “You aren’t ready for that.”Every time you think about leveling up—whether it’s taking on a new project, applying for a promotion, or starting something bold—your inner critic might tell you that you’re not ready. It convinces you that you need another course, certification, or more experience before you’re “allowed” to take the next step. This mindset can paralyze you, making your goals feel further away and unattainable.

2.   “You aren’t good at ___.”Fill in the blank: math, negotiations, technology—whatever you think isn’t your strong suit. The inner critic thrives on convincing you that you must master everything before you can take action. This self-doubt sounds logical, even helpful, but it’s just another excuse to keep you stuck. You don’t need to be perfect to move forward.

3.    “You’re good—no, you’re not.”Binary thinking is a favorite trick of the inner critic. It reduces complex situations to extremes: you’re either smart or stupid, successful or failing, good or bad. This rigid mindset creates anxiety and keeps you from seeing the nuanced reality: you can be both capable and a work in progress.

How to Quiet the Inner Critic

1.    Recognize its presence. The inner critic is a universal part of being human—it’s not going away. Instead of trying to silence it completely, accept that it’s trying (albeit clumsily) to protect you. When it shows up, acknowledge it: “I see you, and I know you’re trying to help. But I don’t need this kind of protection anymore.”

2.   Celebrate your strengths. Shift your focus to what you’re good at. What are your unique skills? What have you achieved? Regularly reflecting on your strengths and accomplishments can retrain your brain to focus on your potential instead of your perceived shortcomings.

3.    Reframe your language. Instead of saying, “I’m not good at ___,” try, “That’s not my strong suit, but I excel at ___.” This small shift creates space for self-compassion and reminds you that you’re more than your perceived weaknesses.

4.   Embrace the gray.Life isn’t black and white, and neither are you. You can be smart and make mistakes. You can be successful and face setbacks. Practice “both/and” thinking instead of “either/or” judgments.

5.    Strengthen your Inner Wise Woman. Your inner wise woman is the calm, intuitive voice within you—the one that knows your strengths, supports your growth, and cheers you on. The more you connect with her, the quieter the inner critic becomes.

WILD Woman Art Tip

Materials: Black paper and oil pastels

Take a moment to ground yourself. Close your eyes, breathe deeply, and connect with your inner critic. Notice the words it uses, the feelings it stirs, and how it shows up. When you’re ready, draw an image that represents your inner critic.

Journal prompts:

• What does my inner critic say to me?

• What do I want to say back?

• What does my inner critic need?

• 
  

Next, shift your focus to your inner wise woman. Connect with her wisdom, kindness, and strength. Imagine what she looks like, how she speaks to you, and what she wants for you. Create an image of her next.

Journal prompts:

• What do I need from my inner wise woman?

• How can she support and encourage me?

Be gentle with yourself. The inner critic isn’t your enemy—it’s a misguided protector. Thank it for its effort, then gently remind it that you’re in charge now. Turn instead to your inner wise woman, who holds the keys to your strengths and resilience. With her guidance, you’ll feel more confident, empowered, and ready to tackle life’s challenges with grace.

By building a relationship with both your inner critic and your inner wise woman, you’ll cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness, self-compassion, and confidence—making it easier to overcome obstacles and move forward on your terms

Myriam Martinez is an Art Therapist and Art Based Coach based out of Northern California. She gently guides women to connect to their WILD through the art process and deeper connection to self and supports them in building fierce self-confidence and feeling empowered. Her calling in this life is to teach women the power and importance of putting themselves first, loving themselves fiercely, and tapping into their creative intuition in order to bring more happiness, success, and ease into their lives.

To learn more about Myriam click here: https://www.myriammartinezcoaching.com/